Sex is a very important part of a marriage, and if you have lost your sexual drive it can lead to problems. Before this happens, you should seek some help. The ways below may help you get your love life back again.
A sex therapist can be very beneficial in helping you and your spouse with any sexual problems you may have. He or she can sit down and talk with each of you to figure out why one of you does not have any sexual drive. This gives you and your spouse a time when you can openly talk about sex together. You may feel embarrassed to talk about this in front of someone else, but remember the therapist has likely heard it all.
The therapist can also get to the root of the problem. For example, your spouse may have problems with you that they have not voiced, such as you not giving them enough affection, the way you spend money, etc. Once all of this gets out in the open, you can then start talking to each other about the problems and work them out.
You and your spouse may also not agree on the amount of sex you need. You may want sex three times a week when your partner only wants to once a week. The sex therapist can help you come up with a resolution that you are both happy with.
Talk with Your Doctor
The partner with the low sex drive should see a doctor to make sure there are no medical reasons why this is happening to them. For men, it could be due to low testosterone levels. If you or your spouse is a woman that is going through menopause, it can be due to testosterone levels, as well as dyspareunia (painful intercourse).
If you or your spouse are on medications, some can cause a low sex drive, such as antidepressants. The doctor may be able to make some adjustments to the medication or try a different one.
If you are feeling a lot of stress about something, this can make your sexual desire plummet. The doctor may suggest that you see a therapist to help you deal with this problem.
Do not plan for sex but make it spontaneous if you can, as this can make it more exciting. If you have small children in your home, however, planning for it may be required.